I know this is late (my blogging has left much to be desired lately), but I have to write about my incredible Mother. I hope I can make it through this without crying...
My Mother is my rock. All throughout my life my Mom has been such a constant source of strength, love, and encouragement. When I think back on my childhood, I think of a woman who warmly nurtured my sister and I. She was full of kisses, laughter, and comfort. When I started to get sick, my Mom was one of my fiercest advocates. When doctors wouldn't believe that I was sick, not just depressed... she pushed them to figure it out. When teachers and school administrators didn't want to give me extra time to make-up assignments or extra grace for missing more class than normal, she figured out the law and fought to keep me in their classes. There's no way I would have graduated high school on time (with honors) had it not been for my Mom. And my Mom always knew how to make me feel better... there is something so comforting about her voice and touch.
As I became an adult, my Mom
always encouraged me in whatever I did... even when it was crazy. Whether it was to fly to Paris the day we declared war on Iraq for a spring break trip with two other friends (Mom, I have no idea how you let me go without saying anything;-)) or to move across the country to pursue a relationship that led me to marrying my wonderful husband (although, that was more wonderful than crazy--- ok, maybe it's both). I'll never forget the day my Mom and Dad left me in Minnesota when I went to school there for like a minute. I cried the entire day. I had some perfume that my Mom also wore and I sprayed it on a sweatshirt and slept with it for like 3 nights.
And then I got married... the whole process would have been utterly incomplete if my Mother had not been there. I had so much fun planning the wedding with my Mom. She was always there to be excited for me, to give great advice, and help talk me through my couple of meltdowns that I experienced. That experience would not have been nearly as enjoyable or fulfilling without my Mom. I am so blessed.
As I mentioned, my Mom is my rock. That's why when we she told me and Spencer that she had breast cancer last December I nearly lost it. My Mom can't be sick. It's hard for me to wrap my brain around the thought of that. This is a woman who very rarely gets sick... maybe a cold or two a year, but rarely anything more. And when she does get sick, she doesn't slow down much. She seems indestructible.
At first I was really scared. But as I prayed more and learned more, I grew more and more peaceful. They found the cancer insanely early and were able to get it all with a lumpectomy and radiation. No chemo PTL!!! And through it all she stayed incredibly healthy and in amazing spirits. Once again, she was strong for all of us.
Mom is doing great now. She's finished with treatment and well on her way to being 100% back to normal. I haven't written about her cancer because I couldn't. I don't really know why... When it comes to things like this I often have to take the "Ignorance is Bliss" route and not think about it. It's too hard... too painful... I'll cry too much. I just have to believe that God will work things out. A friend recently said that she's learning how to feel things without having her heart completely broken. It's a thought that has been resonating in my head ever since. I want to have compassion and have my heart break without it being completely obliterated. I want to be able to be strong and supportive when things like this happen. My Mom knows how to do that.
I love my Mom more than I'll ever be able to express. She's the most amazing woman I've ever known and I will be forever thankful that she's my Mom. And I look forward to the many years that we have ahead of us and all the incredible lessons she'll teach me as I become a Mother.
Happy Mother's Day Mom... you really earned it this year. I LOVE YOU!!!!!
